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Brett Favre signs 1 year contract with the Indianapolis Colts! Breaking News!

September 19, 2011
Favre signs with Indianapolis Colts

Favre returns to football...with the Colts!

Developing story breaking on Da Funion ahead of the media…

While it’s hard to picture the Colts drafting a quarterback older than Kerry Collins, it’s really happening this time.

According to inside sources close to the Colts main office, at 4:35 EST the Indianapolis Colts have signed a 1 year contract to bring Brett Favre out of retirement to serve as a backup to Kerry Collins.

-Update at 11-19-2011 8:06 PM EST – Reuters confirms the story, it official. Brett Favre is a Colt.

-Update 11-20-2011 12:04 AM EST – Favre is reportedly boarding a flight to Indianapolis on Tuesday afternoon.

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Poll Question: Which country should become the 51st state of the U.S.?

May 4, 2011

Vote now!

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Psychic Chicken Predicts Packers to Win Super Bowl XLV

February 5, 2011

Madison, WI –  We picked this little nugget up on YouTube and predict it goes viral.  With the majority of our editorial staff being Madison residents, it’s safe to assume we’re die-hard packer fans and will put our money on psychic chicken any day of the week, assuming of course, it picks the Packers.  It’s hard to say what a chicken named Misses Clucksworth knows about football, but it’s got to be more than Ben Roethlisberger knows about picking up women.

Enjoy the video,  and don’t forget to have some chicken wings during the game

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The Hug Jacket: Helping You Hug Your Loved Ones From Afar

February 4, 2011
The greatest product of all time is most certainly the Hug Jacket. Through the use of highly-modulated memory silicone technology, the Hug Jacket allows users to send a personalized hug from anywhere on earth, to anywhere on earth.

Do you have a loved one serving in the armed services overseas? Do you have a Grandmother in Poland you never get to see? Are you in a long-distance relationship and need to connect on a more physical level? Can’t make it home for the holidays? Look no further friends, the Hug Jacket is here.

All one has to do is show up at a Hug Jacket hug-production center, pay a modest fee, and hug the patented memory silicone Hug Jacket as it is worn by a ballistic-gel torso of similar size and build to your loved one and the jacket will do the rest.

Your hug (up to 30 seconds) will be stored digitally in a .jhug format and will be instantly sent to the Hug Jacket closest to your loved one. All your loved one has to do is provide their name to the nearest Hug Jacket representative, don the Hug Jacket and enjoy your hug as it is replicated exactly as you created it.

The U.S. Armed Forces have already pre-ordered more than 800 Hug Jackets for distribution amongst deployed units across the globe and there are already more than 745 Hug Jacket Production Centers in more than 45 countries worldwide.

Hug Jacket has been keeping families close for more than a decade and has created and perfected the long-distance hug. But you don’t have to take their word for it.

“I was serving in Iraq for almost two years and the only thing that kept me going was every month when I went down to the Hug Jacket station and got those hugs from my wife and our two little girls.” –PFC Jack Bennett, U.S. Marine Corps

Hug Jacket has and always will be a family-owned company which is why they understand the needs of your family. Show your loved ones you care and send them a personalized Hug Jacket hug today!

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Roommate Baffled By Egg Prank

February 2, 2011

Madison, WI—When roommates Chadrick Manning and Mill Willard decided to prank their third roommate Nelson Matthews they had no idea the trick would work so well.

Around 10:30 a.m. while Matthews was still sleeping, Manning and Willard conspired to leave a white egg in the backyard chicken coop knowing that Matthews would discover the egg while outside smoking and likely be confused by its presence as their chickens are brown egg-layers.

“Dude, Mill, you gotta go check out the coop,” said Matthews to a pretending-to-be-confused Willard.  “Something freaky has been going on out there.”

Willard, sweaty from a workout, declined to go out in the chilly air but allowed Matthews to explain what he already knew.  While Willard and Manning tried to urge Matthews to ask the neighbor if any of her chickens laid brown eggs (and perhaps one of them visited the coop to lay the white egg), Matthews opted to spend much of his afternoon researching possible explanations online, and in fact found a reasonable explanation for the egg.

“It (the internet) says that sometimes a chicken can lay a second egg that has yet to be pigmented which is likely what happened to our chickens,” said Matthews as he emerged from his home office.  “It is really the only explanation.”

Willard and Manning decided that it would be too late to tell Matthews about their trick in person, but rather to leak the story to the media instead.

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How Do You Think Riots in Egypt Affect the U.S.?

January 29, 2011

12% – Six more weeks of Winter

18% – Severe drop in camel-related stocks

25% – No more basbusa

8% – Ask the Mayan’s, they seem to know these things

37% – Operation Desert Storm 2: Pharaoh’s Revenge

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Man Doesn’t Understand Roommate’s Racial Joke

January 28, 2011

Baraboo, WI—Wilson Ellery was disappointed in himself after not understanding his roommate Justin Banks’ racial joke that the house had “enough mayonnaise for an entire slave ship.”

“I thought we were almost out of mayonnaise,” said a confused Ellery. “I even put it on my grocery list.”

A shocked Banks looked at Ellery in amazement and went on to explain the that African-Americans stereotypically don’t like mayonnaise, therefore the small amount of mayonnaise left in the jar was indeed enough for an entire slave ship as the slaves (traditionally African-American in U.S. history) wouldn’t eat any of it.

“Wait, so black people really don’t eat mayonnaise?” asked Ellery.  “Why is this the first I am hearing of it?  I feel like I am usually pretty up on my racial stereotypes.”

Banks explained that it was pretty commonly known and that the confused Ellery should leave mayonnaise on his grocery list.